Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Finding a work/life balance ... for now

I took almost 3 weeks off work to get over the nasty gastro-bug H and I had, and a chest/sinus cold that knocked me out.  I also took that time to try and get a handle on my depression and anxiety.  I am now back to work 2/3.  That means I only teach in the afternoons but need to be at work by 11.  Depending on how the morning goes, I drop H off at the sitters between 7:30 and 8 or if she is sleeping in, after 9:30, and then I go home and veg.  I still am suffering from mild insomnia, so I wish I could sleep...but I use that time in the morning to get some chores done (laundry usually), plan for dinner or put dinner in the crock-pot and watch tv, exercise or just veg in bed.  This is me time...and although I feel like I should be more productive, I'm perfectly happy just relaxing.  I'm not going to lie, I love this new schedule.  I always said I wanted to go back to work 2/3 but talked myself out of it saying the money is more important.  Now, since I have an anxiety disorder, I'm off that 1/3 on medical so I'm still getting paid.  This will continue until the end of the school year and then I guess I have to evaluate if I want to go on a 1/3 leave for Sept. or try and go back full-time.   Having this extra time in the mornings has allowed me to slow down and breathe.  I'm no longer rushing around all the time trying to figure out how to cram everything i need to get done in.  I am able to shower before work - which seems miniscule, but is HUGE for me.

I love my mornings with H and if she isn't up at the crack of dawn and wants to sleep a little longer, I love having our morning cuddles.  When I was off sick, I would often fall asleep myself.  But now I'm up with her around 5 am and can't sleep.  However, I now longer have to worry about getting out of bed and having to rush around to get ready for work.  I usually lie there and breathe, try and relax and just let my mind wander. 

Maybe this part-time thing is what I need.  Who knows where the fall will bring but I will enjoy every moment I have now!  

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